Ciao redux

A couple of months ago I wrote about leaving Dana College and how unexpectedly emotional it was. I was most affected by the comments my students made about me as a teacher. They were very (extraordinarily) complimentary about my time there. The whole scenario was both uplifting and at times achingly felt.

Today, two of those students sent me a gift: a t-shirt with their favorite Hermanson sayings from the last year. I include them here without comment except to say I remember saying most of them, and the rest certainly seem plausible. It is interesting to find out what sticks after the final exams are finished.

15) "Pants" is one of the funniest words in the English language.
14) You guys are by far the most attractive class I've ever had.
13) It's the equivalent of "put your hands in the air! Lemme heaer ya say 'Yeah!'" Whitman was the first rapper.
12) Man, John is en fuego. Hey, maybe I'm Spanish!
11) Well, the thing is... Hey, I can see you all in the T.V.!
10) The Gates of Heaven have opened and are singing in your margins!
9) I love the dash! It's like the coolest punctuation mark ever!
8) Cool, I'm black! Hey, maybe I can dance!
7) Women shouldn't write so much. They're not very good at it.
6) Emily Dickinson is the SUV of poetry.
She falls over easily?
Yeah, she's top heavy.
5) It's like the water of Concord made everyone self-reliant.
4) I'm fascinating! I wanna hear what I have to say!
3) Minimum wage goes from whipping to five cents an hour.
2) This may be the first time I ever realized I was wrong.
1) I am Scott Hermanson. I am a kosmos.

Okay, some comments.
1. Apparently I use exclamation points a lot when I talk.
2. My ego may be as large as Judy claims.
3. I hope we all understand that #7 was most likely said sarcastically or perhaps as ventriloquism.
4. All that aside, "Minimum wage goes from whipping to five cents an hour" is damn funny stuff.